Episode 56 is a veritable smorgasbord of worldwide interest and competitive chat. Not only do we make a further attempt to speak to Xavier Laurent in France, but we have received an audio greeting all the way from the Netherlands.

We've also got a brand new game to play on the subject of quotations, which those of you who are fond of guessing things will adore.

We also chat about Indiana Jones' CV (that's his résumé if you're in the US), and some talk of hydrotherapy leads to an idea for criminal swimmers.

I was nearly late today, because there was a jam on the motorway! Ho ho!

We'd also like to take this opportunity to point you in the direction of some other great podcasts which are floating around the interwaves.

Collins and Herring's podcast is two famous guys enjoying a bit of chat and banter, and there are plenty of laughs in it, as well as lots of swearing. They're nice and long, at over an hour each, so if you're at the gym or on a long journey, make sure you take these two with you, as well as The Blueprint, of course.

Stephen Fry, possibly one of the world's busiest and most widely-talented living creatures, has some podcast episodes, or Podgrams as he prefers to call them. They are often incisive and incredibly interesting, whilst the belly laughs, when they come, are superb.

Yes, it's episode 55 of The Blueprint, the British talk radio podcast that brings you the fun behind the mysteries of language and truth, whilst transcending boundaries of distance, speed and endurance. Or something like that.

In this episode, we have another go at contacting our French friend, Xavier, using some cutting edge technology. It goes reasonably well, we think.

The big news this week is another exciting new feature called Real Or Phoney, in which we throw truth and lies around like confetti at the marriage of Mr Veracity to Miss Duplicity.

We hope you're enjoying the show, please drop us a line if you've got anything to say, ask, or complain to us about.

This lady is either demonstrating a sneeze for us, or this photo has something to do with one of Dave's other topics about the speed of bodily functions.

Join us for more Blueprint fun and laughter next week.

The theme of Episode 54 is most certainly that of language, and it's many uses. From Noel Coward's special way of speaking, through to Ozzy Osbourne's special way of singing, people certainly find their own ways to use language, and so do we.

Ever keen to embrace the wider world, we make attempts to contact a French podcaster (do you think he likes us?) and we hope to speak to him again soon.

To illustrate the success level of our French escapade, here's the metaphorical street that we ended up in:

Rue De Merde

We'll be back next week with more such talk, and more “Who's The Greatest” fun and frolics.

Welcome back to episode 53, in which Chris and Dave once again tackle the mighty issues of the day.

This week, after some parenting advice from Chris regarding Star Trek: The Next Generation, we're keen to settle once and for all the question of who's the greatest - Batman, Spiderman or Superman? As laymen in the superhero knowledge world, we don't use the usual set of criteria for judging such things, though. We've got our own ideas.

For example, with which of the three would you feel most uncomfortable if you were trapped with them, naked in a lift (elevator, American listeners). Which would make the best rabbi? You get the picture.

This week's visual aid constitutes proof of the result of the first “Who's The Greatest” contest.

Please take the time to fill in our Listener Survey - it only takes a minute or two, and it helps us to find out, broadly speaking, what sort of people we've got listening to the podcast. That in turn helps us to improve what we do.

The Blueprint Podcast returns for this weeks' adventure, and we're trotting the globe and getting to grips with Stephen Hawking and Barry White, among others.

More of Dave's pet hates are explored as we delve deeper into his inner fury, and find out why the letter “H” makes his blood boil.

In other stories, we've got it all sorted out for Professor Stephen Hawking, after Dave meets a party guest with some alarming views on the secret of the scientist's success.

What's more, if you're listening in America, Dave's got some kind words for you about your country, so that should make you feel good, whichever way you're planning to vote in your upcoming election.

Speaking of popularity contests, make sure that you join us next week on Friday, November 7th, when we'll be putting a few things into their proper places.

Stephen Hawking. He can fly.

Hello, hope you had a good week. We're back once again with episode 51 of The Blueprint Podcast, right here in the UK with Chris and Dave.

This week, we get to the heart of the Dave Russell phenomenon by discovering a couple of things that really grind his gears.

We warm up first with some talk of spherical stimulating toys for babies, and an astonishing Chris Fact is revealed, closely followed by a Chris Lie.

Astrology is described by Wikipedia as “a group of systems, traditions, and beliefs in which knowledge of the apparent relative positions of celestial bodies and related details is held to be useful in understanding, interpreting, and organizing information about personality, human affairs, and other terrestrial matters”. It's described by Dave as “nonsense”, and he pulls no punches with a scathing attack on the whole idea.

If you're a firm believer in newspaper horoscopes, please have a quiet word with yourself.

Binoculars, or more specifically their misrepresentation in the cinema, are Dave's second target, although Chris disagrees, and hilarity ensues.

It's all happening.

This week's image is the visual representation of Dave's hate.

We'll be back with Episode 52 at 5pm (UK Time) on Friday, 31st October. See you then.

As promised, we've now got new episodes of the Blueprint Podcast coming your way on Fridays at 5pm (UK Time) once again. Again, many apologies for the hiatus, and I hope you enjoy the new stuff.

This episode sees the podcasting debut of Dave Russell, an old friend of mine from Sixth Form College. Dave lives in France most of the time, so we're lucky to have him on board for a while while he's spending some time in the UK.

In this episode, we reboot with a brief history of The Blueprint, which leads us, of course, onto some allegedly topless blondes who robbed a teenager in the street recently. As with so many quirky stories, though, the briefest of investigations shows that not all is as it seems. Honestly, it's like they start with the headline and then look for a story to sort of fit in with it, sometimes.

Then it's a brief guided tour of the Amsterdam Sex Museum which, as you may expect, is a truly bizarre place, and one where visitors adopt those facial expressions. You know the ones - “I'm an enlightened modern person, this isn't funny or crude, it's simply the expression of our basic primal de… …look, there's some breasts!”

Ensuring that Dave gets a proper baptism of fire (pun intended), we then get into religion and The Bible by way of a sulky priest who refuses to speak during services.

So, back with a vengeance, then. Please let us know what you think of the show, which you can do by emailing (link at the top of the page at www.blueprintpodcast.com) . If you have time (and you do, otherwise why are you reading this?) please take a minute to complete our Listener survey, which helps us to keep track of the general shape of our listenership.

Episode 51 will be right here at 5pm (UK Time) on Friday, October 24th.

Here's an aerial photo of Amsterdam, where you can combine elegance with coarseness within two or three strides, and be almost run over by a tram or cyclist whenever you like.

With further apologies for last week's no-show, The Blueprint Podcast is back with episode 49. No Greg this week, but I hope you won't mind spending a little time with just me instead.

Quirkies this week include a convicted murderer in the US, who pulls an unusual series of mindflips by agreeing to be turned into fish food for a piece of art after his execution, but also frantically appealing against his death sentence. Now in this life, you either want to be fish food or you don't. Nobody likes a ditherer. Or a murderer, for that matter.

As well as the usual quirky stories, we've also got some great music in this week's Blueprint, from Bluesman Tom Malafarina, Oriskany Strings, and Blue Valentine, all of whom are from America.

This weeks' pictorial side dish is of some fish food.

Oops, sorry about being a bit late with getting this one online. You try telling my eight-year-old that he has to stop playing Star Wars Battlefront II in the middle of a crucial mission. That's what was going on. And then the podcast's database server seemed to be down for a bit. But finally, here it is.

We get into a few topics, chiefly our recent weekend at The Green Man Festival in South Wales, and the fact that both of us have given up smoking. Expect flashing tempers in coming episodes.

 Please join us next week for episode 49, and fill in the Blueprint Podcast Survey (link at the top of the page) so that we can read your very thoughts.

This week, here's a panoramic view across the Green Man mainstage area. A seriously niiiice music festival.

We never know which is the best way in which to open a new episode of The Blueprint Podcast, as the beginning of this one demonstrates. Greg likes to state the facts, and Chris likes to showboat like a 1980's holiday disc jockey.

Television animals get us started this week, before we move into cartoons, particularly the Hanna Barbera-style ones in which some sort of unusual beast accompanies a teenage gang as they travel the United States in search of mysteries to solve. Sadly, this brings about the startling realisation that  many of our favourite animated heroes were actually the tragic victims of their so-called friends.

We celebrate the wisdom of Bill Cosby for a while, beofre bemoaning the existence of the cartoon spin-off Fonz And the Happy Days Gang, which, was ridiculous on every level.

The cartoon chat culminates in a nostalgic mood with The Incredible New Shmoo, a sort of white shapeshifting abomination capable of assisting his teenage pals in the unravelling of mysterious events.

Then it's quirky story time, and UFOs are definitively sorted out, along with the slightly odd notion of a special police bra, before Chris and Greg compare their childhood Action Man (that's GI Joe if you're in the USA) collections.

We'll be back, friends. Back. It'll happen On Friday, 22nd August at 5pm (UK time). Join us then, we'll put the kettle on.

Here's the Shmoo. The Incredible New Shmoo.