Stories this week include:
- Supermarket manager attempts to cut short impromptu guitar solo by eight-year-old.
- 'Celebrated' editor takes to his keyboard to vent fury at pigeon-feeding pensioner.
- Drunk man fails to order Happy Meal from car wash.
- An alarming new crave called 'Water Drinking Battle for Men' is sweeping Japan.
Also revealed: We spend too much time perfecting our Roland Rat impressions...